Each week, Scott Gallagher breaks down the show minute by minute in Survivor Pop Culture Recap. It’s live blogging complete with commercial breaks.
Survivor Pop Culture Recap: Sophie’s Choice
Welcome back to me. I’m back after a little boys weekend to Lake Tahoe, where I can say with full sincerity that I didn’t step outside for the 72-hours that we were there. I think that is some sort of gambling achievement that should warrant you a free t-shirt from the casino or something, right? Anyhow, it was a great trip. I got to go to In N Out Burger twice, which I’m pretty sure if I ever end up on Death Row, the last meal I would request before facing the “chair” would be In N Out.
So yeah, here we are on Survivor night and I just caught up with watching last week’s episode. I guess the producers said: “Screw it. Even though it makes no sense to the theme of this season, let’s just randomly create three teams for the week”. It turned out to be a fairly entertaining episode, mostly because the producers Survivor gods decided to reward David for his move two weeks ago, and led him right to another hidden immunity idol. Seriously, I don’t care if it was completely fixed for him to get it, I’m glad he got it. I’m even more surprised that I’m openly rooting for David now considering how little I cared about him at the start of the season. David has shown that he has the “coconuts” to make big moves, even moves that might hurt his game like playing an idol to keep numbers on his side.
I’m also semi on the #TeamKen camp even though Ken delivers every line like he’s the helpful older brother from an afterschool special movie. I don’t think Ken has any real chance to win the game, so every episode I’m just going to appreciate the time we get with him. Finally, I think Adam would be a Survivor winner worthy of respect. Somehow we need to get Adam, Ken, and David all playing together in some sort of super-alliance…I feel like we are somewhat close to this happening and it would really make for some interesting Survivoring for me. David-Ken-Adam joining forces would provide the most entertaining viewing experience for me, everyone else doesn’t really move the needle for me.
I do think Michelle is somewhat entertaining in that she has the coldness of a sociopathic serial killer. Seriously, I don’t know what kind of “mission” she was on before she came onto this show, but I would check with the local authorities from those towns about any unsolved murders from that time….maybe I’m a a tad extreme, but just watch the look in her eyes tonight and tell me that I’m wrong.
Chris is somewhat fun to watch play, in that if it’s a physical competition he makes the rest of the men look like toddlers trying to wrestle their dad. Combine that with the fact that he might snap the next time he gets blindsided at Tribal and it may take the off-camera crew hitting him with blowdarts to subdue him.
Nobody else really sticks out to me. I would really like to see Figgy or Taylor go tonight still on pure principle for sticking up their middle fingers at the Survivor Gods and all of us by openly being a couple in the game. Let’s get everyone else united around this cause to send one of them home tonight, please.
It’s 8 pm Portland, Oregon time, so let’s see what tonight has in store for us!
Previously on Survivor
We recap last week’s episode and split. Basically, the whole episode was the David Tribe and how that shook out. It doesn’t leave us with a lot of understanding of the dynamics of the other two tribes but it doesn’t really matter…We just need to focus on getting David, Ken, and Adam all on the same page here.
We join the players post-vote from the last episode. David sums up why he voted the way he did to build trust– all in all, it was a good move for David.
Zeke, though, is mocking the move and stating that he is now in a “power position” in the game….Settle down, Zeke…Settle down.
Next, we join the green tribe as Jay tells us about his “passion” which is taking care of his family. Jay gets emotional talking about how Millennials aren’t the selfish pricks they are made out to be…I guess we are still having to be hammered with this Gen X vs Millennials thing. As Jay is emotionally talking about his mom and sister and growing up without a father, off-camera cue cards are probably being held up telling him to work in the whole Gen X vs Millennials thing….We get it…We get it.
Jay and Will find the tree branch with the tribe symbol on it and bang! Now they/or he(Jay) has an idol.
Jay tells Will to shut the f up about this, but before he can get the words out of his mouth Michaela walks right into this situation and now this table for two has turned into a party of three. Michaela, though, doesn’t seem too excited about Jay’s good fortune and tells us she will snitch about it whenever she feels she needs to. That should be a fun moment.
Okay, so taking true politics out of this, I was going to make the Trump is Biff Tannen in the alternate 1985 from Back to the Future Two and someone made that video for me already apparently.
Again, taking true politics out of this, no matter what side you might lean on, isn’t the resemblance of Trump and Biff Tannen in alternate 1985 uncanny? The characteristics between the two of them is downright scary. Moving forward, everyone, please keep an eye out for Gray’s Sports Almanac whenever you see Trump. It’s getting to the point where we may need to send someone back in time when Trump tried to date-rape Lorriane Baines-McFly at the Enchantment Under the Sea Dance, and of course, correct that universe to prevent this morbid alternate universe that might be unleashed upon us very soon.
Back from break, we come to the Reward Challenge. Jeff shares that CeCe was voted out and Figgy literally starts clapping and almost starts crying that Michelle was left in the game….probably because Michelle would have shanked her during the challenge if Figgy would have reacted any other way.
The winner of this challenge wins deserts, with milk…Milk would probably be gross, but everything else probably is looking pretty good to everyone.
The challenge consists of blindfolded people being told directions from people afar.
We have chaos as David, bless his soul, wasn’t born with an ounce of any athletic, hand-eye coordination. You name it and he wasn’t born with it as he wanders aimlessly throughout the battlefield.
It comes down to the blindfolded people needing to complete a puzzle while the directions are being screamed at them. I would be god awful at this.
Not that it really matters here since we are talking about a cookie reward, but thankfully Taylor and Figgy’s team loses. Everyone else gets cookies and pie…Figgy and Taylor do not…
Before we can all rejoice in Figgy’s loss, we get Hannah who reports that she was feeling faint during the competition (She wasn’t even in the competition), and starts randomly having a panic attack. This requires the medical man disgustedly telling Hannah to calm down and he tells her to breath more slowly… And I guess we’re done with that as Hannah gets up and is fine.
Figgy starts crying because her team lost, and god, I hope she goes tonight….This sends us to commercial.
Oh hey, it’s Tom Hanks in another one of those Da Vinci Code movies…This one is called Inferno.
This character he’s playing sure keeps finding himself in quite the situations. Hey, I bet you didn’t know that Tom Hanks had a son that raps!
I’m sure growing up in Beverly Hills with an allowance that would make us all sick to our stomachs has empowered him to rap about some real sh*t. Yes, I’m probably jealous, but seriously, Tom Hanks’ son Chet is a rapper..Let that thought sink in for a second. I could spend the next three hours in a YouTube vortex watching/listening to Chet Hanx rap songs.
Back from break as the orange team enjoys their desserts.
Zeke points out that Figgy was obviously too happy to see Michelle still in the game and he knows that she is a dangerous player. He knows the next move if available is to take out Michelle or another Millennial.
Next, we join the green team as Hannah explains her “panic” to Sunday. Sunday tries to show empathy to Hannah, but you can tell that her heart isn’t fully into it.
We then join the purple team. Taylor kisses Figgy in front of everybody. Taylor tells us that he and Figgy are a “power couple” and everybody knows it except for Ken and Jessica and they want to tell them. This is the least likable couple since Kanye and Kim Kardashian, I tell you.
Figgy goes and tells Jessica and Ken about the “power couple” reality. They both look at her like she is stating the obvious, which she is. The look in Jessica’s eyes sometimes is crazy looking too, by the way… but not in a mean way, just in a Charlize Theron in Monster kind of way.
Anyways, she takes the formal news in stride. Ken, on the other hand, is properly annoyed by the whole thing and hopefully this will lead to one of them getting voted out tonight.
It’s the Halloween time of the year. Always a fun time, right? I have know idea what I’m going as this year. As far as costumes go, I’ve had some doozies in my childhood. In the 80s, my mother went through a phase where she was super-Christian and wouldn’t let us kids dress up as anything “satanic”, which I guess meant anything that was evil, like Freddy Kruger, for example, or Jason from the Friday the Thirteenth movies. So no satanic movies but apparently racially insensitive costumes were okay, as one year I dressed up as Michael Jackson…with…blackface make-up on.
The make-up wasn’t exactly put on liberally. Yeah, I went out in public with blackface on as Michael Jackson! In my defense, I was nine and I loved Michael Jackson. In today’s world, I would probably have (justifiably so) been locked up for that. Still, my dream is to go as Captain EO one of these Halloweens.
Okay, back from break and it’s time for the Immunity Challenge.
Side thought: Has Will had any “moment” this season of Survivor? I feel like we have not seen anything from the kid. Okay, side thought over.
Basically, the game this week is running on balance beams, climbing on top of things to get balls out of bags that will then be used to complete a maze-thingy. I would say based on tonight so far that either the orange team (Zeke and David’s team) or purple team (Figgy and Taylor’s team) will be going to Tribal. The green team (Hannah and Michaela’s team) seems like they are safe this week.
And yeah, the green team comes in first place. It comes down to purple vs orange.
And orange wins! Yes, so Figgy/Taylor, Ken, Sunday, and Adam going to Tribal.
Okay– real talk. As we head into this last segment of the show, Figgy or Taylor has to go tonight, right? I’m sitting here getting worked up that somehow one of them is going to get out of this and I just want someone to tell me that it’s going to be okay and that one of them is going to go. Can we please make sure this happens? I feel fairly confident that between Ken and Adam, they will make sure this “power couple” doesn’t live to see another episode. It just can’t happen, right? I mean, go back and watch the segment of Figgy talking with Jessica and Ken about their romance and I dare you not to vomit. This has to end…tonight!
Oh by the way, has anybody seen Westworld on HBO? I’ve got to say it’s the new show that I’ve been looking for. I think I wrote about it two weeks ago here, but it’s better than I thought it would be. I’m completely all in on it and I wonder what other people are feeling about it?
Back from break, we join the purple team post-losing the competition. Adam tells us that he is conflicted and I hope to god he doesn’t f**k this up for us…I have backed Adam this whole game, so I hope this side convo you are having with Figgy is just a smokescreen for the blindside.
Taylor proposes that Adam could be playing both sides and that maybe he is “smarter than he seems then he says: “Maybe, but I doubt it.”…Wow…Wow.
Jessica and Adam talk about the obvious play that needs to happen. Jessica knows the talk is for Ken to be voted out, but she tells us that she can’t let that happen. Hopefully, she can redeem herself from her dismal Tribal from two weeks ago.
Ken makes his pitch to Adam. Adam tells us that he is conflicted and he knows all of us at home are screaming at him to take one of Figtails out!
We go to Tribal and who knows what the hell is going to happen. I hope producers are just trying to build drama and this vote will be a no-brainer, no-drama vote….
Jeff asks Figgy why it would possibly be socially acceptable for her and Taylor to be a full-on couple in Survivor. Figgy tells us that she and Taylor are being very “strategic” with all of their moves. That line just almost caused me to have a stroke.
We get great moments of insight from Adam who explains his dilemma about splitting from the Millennials, which I guess we can all understand, but come on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We can’t allow this to continue, Adam…Please!!!!
We go to the votes:
Figgy has just been 86’d from the game…Let’s go to live actions shots from around the world:
First off, let’s take a second to applaud Adam for just doing the right thing. You reading this, yeah you, I’m talking to you– take a second and say thank you to Adam.
So thankfully, the right thing happened and now we can all move on and really focus on Survivor. The evil empire is over. I wonder how conflicted Adam really was in making the move. I guess it doesn’t matter– we move on. What is going to happen now? Who is in control in this game?
It seems like the threesome of Jessica, Ken, and Adam is quite the formidable three. If they can make it to the merge and join forces with Zeke and David, this will be a rap. Those five would waltz to the final five if they don’t get to paranoid (which I guess obviously would happen), but I would really be a fan of those five. Actually, I’m sure Jessica would screw it up somehow. You’ve got to hand it to my boy Ken. He has survived with his head on the chopping block week after week, but he’s still there and growing stronger.
I don’t know about you guys, but I really don’t think there is anybody else that I would put ahead of the five I just mentioned….Let me know if you think I’m forgetting about somebody, but I think I got my five locked in:
Boom! That’s the power ranking. Who am I missing? Thanks for reading and I will see you next week.
For the complete schedule of Survivor blogs: RHAP Survivor Blog Schedule.