Earlier this year, Rob Cesternino and Tyson Apostol (Survivor Tocantins, Survivor Heroes vs. Villains) vowed that they would do a podcast together about the worst movie of the summer. When Piranha 3DD opened in theaters last weekend and simultaneously came out on Video on Demand, Rob and Tyson knew what would happen next.
Tyson sets up the events that transpired in the first Piranha 3D film after a spring break gone horribly wrong at Lake Victoria back in 2010. Rob was actually impressed with the number of celebrities in the first piranha film including Jerry O’Connell, Elisabeth Shue, Adam Scott, Richard Dreyfuss and Christopher Lloyd. The appeal of the first film for many men was that it combined elements of a horror film with a lot of gratuitous nudity.
The second film picks up in a nearby town in Merkin county where Maddy (Danielle Panabaker) returns home to the family owned water park to see that her step-dad Chet (David Koechner) has opened up an adults-only section of the waterpark called “The Wet Spot”. In this section, women are allowed to swim naked and as Chet says in the commercial DD’s swim free. Maddy is appalled by what her step dad is doing to the family business.
Meanwhile, the Piranhas are on the prowl after already killing off Gary Busey in the film’s opening scene. When two of Maddy’s friends show up, Ashley and Shelby (played by Katrina Bowden from 30 Rock) things only get worse. Ashley is killed after van rolls into the lake while having sex with her boyfriend. Meanwhile, Shelby, a virgin, ends up having an unpleasant time skinny dipping after a baby piranha swims into her vagina. This piranha wreaks havoc with Shelby’s overall health but is generally well behaved until the scene where Shelby has sex with her boyfriend and the piranha bites down on his penis. The boyfriend, not knowing what to do, takes out a butcher knife and cuts his entire penis off.
In the movie’s second half David Hasselhoff shows up as a guest lifeguard for the grand opening of the water park. Ving Rhames and Paul Scheer also show up reprising their roles from Piranha 3D. Around this time, despite the warnings from Maddy that the lake water Chet was pumping into the water park may be Piranha infested, Chet continues to go along with his plan. Before long, the entire water park is teaming with prehistoric killer piranhas. There are many gruesome deaths that take please including Chet’s beheading and subsequent motorboating (not the ideal order of events).
Rob and Tyson discuss the entire film of Piranha 3DD extensively covering each of the memorable scenes in the movie. Later in the show, Rob asks Tyson some questions from the listeners of Rob Has a Podcast about the film. Rob and Tyson discuss, in length, where the Piranha franchise needs to go from here and what should happen in a Piranha 3DDD.
In what should be some sort of record, you’re about to listen to a 141 minute podcast about an 83 minute movie.