The Celebrity Apprentice

Guest Post: The Secret Double Life of Amanda the Secretary

A Celebrity Apprentice Guest Post from Jordan Kalish

Fashion mogul by day, receptionist by night! How many hats does this woman wear? I’m beginning to think there’s more to Amanda than we’ve seen on the Celebrity Apprentice. Until this episode we all thought her only job was Trump’s boardroom receptionist. We thought the only sentence she knew how to say was “Mr. Trump will see you now”. We thought she just sat at that desk all day writing about how boring her life was. However, in this episode we saw her in a whole new light. Apparently, she isn’t just Donald Trump’s assistant, she’s also Ivanka’s! Not only that, but she actually leaves the confines of the boardroom lobby.

This got me thinking… If her boundaries extend past her desk, who’s to say that she’s not a masked vigilante? Is there any evidence that Jim Gordon isn’t on top of Trump Tower right now with the bat-signal? I’m gonna come out and say it: Amanda is Batman! While I don’t have all the evidence yet, I do know one thing for sure. Amanda is the receptionist we deserve, but not the one we need right now. Or is it the other way around?

Episode 3 MVP: Adam Carolla (x2)

I didn’t want to give Adam the MVP twice in three episodes but I really had no choice. There are three reasons why Adam is so far the breakout star this season. 1, because he’s hilarious. 2, because he’s hilarious. And 3… it’s also because he’s hilarious. In an episode that really brought no conflict, we really needed humor and Adam brought it once again. His joke about window dressing being something you put on leafy greens was corny, but funny, and his idea for a third display window in which Ivanka would be taking a mid-day nap was even better. In the boardroom, he said that the Trumps should waterboard the women in order to get an answer out of them as to who should be fired. While I don’t condone this as a form of punishment in most cases, I really think he had a point there. My favorite moment of his was when he spread his hands out of the camera’s view during a confessional and said he was giving America the finger. I heard of a teacher once who had one good student in her class. On his report card, she wrote that he was a shooting star among a sea of burning embers. So far, Adam is the shooting star among the burning embers that are these other cast members. While Arsenio and Lisa once in a while say something funny, nobody comes close to Adam Carolla’s level of entertainment.

We usually talk about unintentional inappropriate comments in association with Jeff Probst. However, Adam gave us one this week that cannot go unmentioned. While talking about a piece of metal on the window he said that “we gotta whack this off”. Even the master Jeff would have been proud of this one. A close second place goes to Paul Teutul Sr. who asked Lou “why do you have to be so big?” I don’t think there’s ever been a better “That’s what she said” opportunity in the history of the Celebrity Apprentice.

The Trump Factor

In this episode, Trump decided to fire George Takei (“Oh my”), the losing project manager. While last episode he made the mistake of firing Victoria Gotti, someone who was actually a source of drama, this time he made the right choice. George had a cool voice, but didn’t add much substance to the show. While I did enjoy him talking about Arsenio’s ‘panache’, which sounds to me like some kind of potato kanish, Lou and Arsenio are better to keep around. Lou seems kind of crazy and I can see him at some point flipping out like Meat Loaf. Arsenio can be funny and plays off Adam’s humor well. Therefore it was only right that Sulu wore the red shirt this episode.

Ivanka got to promote her clothes and Donnie Douche got to point out the obvious, so I’m sure they were both happy. Erik Trump even joined in on the fun and made some douchey comment about Dee Snider being a sacrificial lamb while giggling like his brother usually does. I guess he’s learned the ways of the male Trump offspring. This doesn’t leave much hope for Baron.

Behind the Scenes

– Let’s just say Arsenio found out how much twin models go for per night.

– Producers considered using a cardboard cutout of Michael Andretti during some of the scenes, but decided against it when the cutout starting talking. Nobody would have believed it was actually Andretti.

Things to consider for episode 4

– Is Amanda actually batman?

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