Bachelorette

The Bachelorette Running Diary Week 8 – Desi’s hometown date tour of America

Another week, another episode of America’s favorite guilty pleasure, “The Bachelorette.”

Before we get to this week’s episode, I wanted to share something. There was a Bachelor casting call in Denver last weekend. After getting permission from ABC, I attended. I was there for about two hours and talked to the show’s casting director and about 10-12 different women who were applying to be on the next season of “The Bachelor.”

It was incredibly informative. I got quite a bit of insight into the process and came away with some interesting theories on the motivations of the women who apply to be on the show.

I’m still going over my notes and I haven’t transcribed any of my interviews yet (I use a digital tape recorder, my shorthand sucks) but once I do I’ll share what I discovered. I’ll probably use it as a post during the week of the “Men Tell All” episode. That’s easily the most useless episode of the season as the men never really say anything relevant, so chances are my Bach Casting Call post will go in the place of that week’s running diary.

While I’m saving most of what I found out for later, here are some casting call details to whet your appetite.

  • There were three ABC reps at the event, the casting director and two others who work for her. There were other people there who were hired locally to help out. I was told there are eight people total on the show’s casting team.
  • I spoke with wannabe Bachelor contestants from a wide variety of age ranges, from 22-36.
  • There were about 300 women applying but there were also some men who filled out applications to be the Bachelor and be on the Bachelorette. About 40 or so.
  • The casting director told me (and I believe her) that she didn’t know who the next Bachelor was yet. The CD, named Lacey, was very helpful. I think if she knew she would have just told me she couldn’t tell me.
  • When I asked the contestants I talked to what their parents/family thought about them applying they all hesitated/stuttered in their reply. As if they were embarrassed to be there. I found this funny.
  • If you have any questions about the Bach casting process you’re dying to know, leave a message on this post. I have the casting director’s email address and phone number and she said I could contact her if I had any follow up questions.

Okay, that’s it for now. Let’s get to this week’s episode, which is always one of my favorites of the year, the hometowns. As always, be sure to check out the flavor filling links.

7:01 – We see the usual stuff during tonight’s preview but best of all, we get a peek at Desi’s douchey brother. Yes! I love that guy. And by love I mean I love to hate him. How does Desi’s brother not have his own reality show?

ZakW The only guy left who would be even remotely entertaining as the next Bachelor[/caption]

7:02 – Zak, the only guy left who would be even remotely entertaining as the next Bachelor, has the first hometown date in Dallas. I’ve never been to Dallas, but if it’s anything like the nighttime soap opera my parents used to watch when I was a kid, it sounds like an interesting town.

7:05 – Before meeting with the parents, Zak decides to introduce Desi to the family business – snow cones. That’s right, Zak’s family owns a snow cone truck. I did not see that coming. I guess when he lists his job as “drilling fluid engineer” the fluid he’s referring to is cherry syrup.

7:12 – Desi meets Zak’s family. I hate them immediately. They’re the best looking family in Bachelorette history. Even the dad is good looking. He looks like he’s straight out of a Cialis commercial.

7:21 – Zak’s hometown visit was about as good as it could get. Great family, very welcoming, and they even sing songs. Sadly, I don’t think Zak is in the running to “win” this competition. I’m going to call my ABC contacts and lobby for Zak to be the next Bach. He has the abs for it.

drew

Sooooo boring.

7:25 – Drew has Desi visiting Scottsdale, AZ. I know he’s good looking and all but just like Zak, I don’t think Drew has a shot. He’s sooooo boring. If he’s the next Bachelor (he reminds me a bit of former Bachelor Jake Pavelka) I’ll shoot myself in the foot.

7:37 – Drew is going on and on with his mom about his feelings for Desi Pfft. I think he wants so desperately to be in love that he’s projecting feelings that aren’t there. And that’s my relationship column blurb of the night.

7:42 – And Drew’s date ends. These first two dates couldn’t be more different. Zak’s was fun and easy, Drew’s was very serious. Not to beat a dead horse (And who would do that anyway?!?), I just don’t see any chemistry with either guy. Maybe it’s not the guys who are the problem. Maybe it’s Desi. She acts the same way with every guy.

w8-chris

More bases to come for Chris?

7:47 – Desi is now in Oregon to hang out with Chris. Please, for the love that all that is holy, please don’t read a poem Chris.

7:49 – Chris, who used to play baseball, is hitting home runs while playing ball with Desi. This would be impressive, if he wasn’t hitting them over the fence of a little league field.

7:57 – During dinner, Chris’s dad, who is a chiropractor, thinks it would be a good time to give Desi an “adjustment.” I’m not sure what’s weirder, that Chris’s family has a chiropractor’s office in the basement of his house or that or the situation seemed like a setup in a porno.

8:00 – And now Chris’s dad is using some weird device to clear out his son’s nasal passages. I’m watching a 50-year old dad blow his 20-something kid’s nose. Yuck.

8:04 – Chris’s hometown date ends. Chris’s family is kinda weird. Not Shawntel funeral home director weird, just weird weird. I can’t put my finger on it.

w8-brooks

Bad Hair Brooks

8:09 – We finish with Bad Hair Brooks. Brooks lives in Salt Lake City, Utah, which means he must be Mormon just like Jef “With One F” Holm (who just might be the next Bachelor). Get ready for some polygamy jokes!
8:19 – Desi meets Brooks’s family. Not surprisingly, it’s by far the biggest family she’s met so far. It looks like a family reunion. I wonder which women Brooks is already married to?8:13 – Says Desi, “When I picture my life with Brooks I picture fun. I picture adventure. I also picture sharing him with at least two other wives.” Okay, I made that last part up but you KNOW Desi’s thinking it.

8:27 – And all the hometown dates are over. That’s it?!! These were too bland. Where’s the shotgun toting dad?!? Where’s the weird sibling that tells Desi she’s not good enough for his/her brother? Where’s the drunken uncle who acts inappropriately?!? That’s the problem with this year’s group of bachelors – they’re too normal. Except for Brooks and all his off camera sister wives.

8:31 – Desi’s brother Nate has been invited by ABC producers to add some drama to a drama-less season. Desi says she hasn’t seen her brother since she was on Sean’s season. Say what?!? Isn’t that a little odd? Sean’s season had to have been filmed over a year ago. How long do you go without seeing a sibling? I guess Nate wasn’t invited home for Xmas.

8:35 – Nate reassures Desi that he’ll be on his best behavior but it’s clear he’s full of it. He’s a pot-stirrer, plain and simple. Personally, I think the only guy who could handle Nate’s level of doucheyness is Zak. The rest of the bachelors would fold like a burrito.

8:41 – Desi is talking with Chris Harrison. Harrison, finally doing his job, brings up last week’s comment that Desi made about being in love with Brooks. Desi confirmed it. Brooks is the only guy who hasn’t told Desi that he loves her. I’m no relationship expert, but this only works in Brooks favor. Like most people, Desi wants what she can’t have.

8:42 – Gah! Now Desi just said, “I see a proposal at the end. I can’t gauge what’s going to happen at the end but I’m hopeful the proposal will be with Brooks. However, I’m going to drag this whole thing out so I can bring my family (except Nate of course) on a trip to an exotic island to help me make my decision.” Okay, I again made that last sentence up but WTF?!? How is this show not over?!?

8:44 – Harrison is greeting the four bachelors as Desi rambles a voiceover while looking at pictures of her remaining men. It couldn’t be clearer that Brooks is her first choice and Chris is Plan B. If Desi is so sure, why is this season being dragged out?

8:50 – Final rose ceremony time. My money is on Zak going home. That said, Desi might as well get rid of Drew too.

8:52 – Chris Harrison, descendent of Archimedes, walks out and tells Desi that after she has passed out two roses (to Brooks and Chris) that she has one rose left. After the embarrassment I caused him from last week’s blog title, Harrison won’t make the mistake of forgetting to remind Desi how many roses she has left again.

8:53 – And Drew gets the last rose. Bachelor contender Zak is sent home.

8:55 – After she cuts him loose, Desi chats one-on-one with Zak. The dude takes his rejection like a champ. Of all the guys from this season, he’s easily the frontrunner to be the next Bachelor.

8:57 – Oh crap, we see a preview for next week. Next week is the Men Tell All episode. What happened to the exotic local episode where Desi takes her three remaining men into a fantasy suite?!? Looks like I have some work to do this week. The finale is in TWO WEEKS! I thought I had more time.

8:59 – At the end of the very long preview for the next two episodes, we see Des breaking down while talking with Chris Harrison. Could Brooks back out? What would happen this season if she did? That would be awesome!

Final thoughts – When this show gets near the end of the season is when it’s the biggest challenge for me. There are lots of things to make fun of early in the season, near the end things get serious. Not too many jokes I can make watching a guy get his heart ripped from his chest Temple of Doom-style…While I was talking to the casting director last weekend I brought up my brother and the fact that I’ve tried to get him to apply to be the Bachelor. Now that I have an IN, I might just try again…Brooks is the worst dresser of the remaining men. Hands down!…I’m pretty sure Desi’s brother Nate is a recovering drug addict. This is just a guess.

See you all next week!

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