Survivor NZ: Thailand

Survivor NZ: Thailand — “Confused and Jayded”

Logan Saunders recaps episode 10 of Survivor NZ: Thailand ahead of episode 11.

SURVIVOR NZ: THAILAND Episode 10: “DON’T STUFF YOURSELF”

Previously on Survivor NZ: It was a tale of two tribes. Both had their dominant alliances and both had their hidden immunity idols. Dave with one and Brad with the other but eventually two tribes became one. Original Khangkhaw held control. Securing his alliance, Brad was making plans for the end game, but his long-term aspirations didn’t go unnoticed. And the original Khangkhaw conspired to get rid of one of their own. And the biggest blindside in the biggest competition thus far saw Brad depart from the game with an idol in his pocket.

TESS: What just happened?

Classic reaction.

 

PHSAN

NIGHT 26

Tess feels like she is on the outer circle. She doesn’t know if there is a Khangkhaw alliance anymore. Matt outright tells her that Brad was making F2 and F3 alliances without him.

TESS (to ADAM and LISA): I don’t feel safe with the Khangkhaw alliance.

LISA: You weren’t the third person in the Final Three.

ADAM: Neither was Matt.

Tess looks like she is choking herself while Lisa and Adam talk to her. I for one am worried.

Hey, a full intro again.

PHSAN

ADAM

DAVE

EVE

LISA

MATT

RENEE

TARA

TESS

PHSAN

DAY 27

Adam is rocking in a hammock. Eve is singing a song to the chickens that feels like originated from a Julie Andrews musical.

ADAM: Better lay some eggs or we’re gonna eat your legs.

Not from a Julie Andrews musical.

Tess keeps repeating to us her distrust of the three Chani members.

TESS: I have no one to cling to at the moment. I have no lifeline.

I don’t think anyone will write your name down at the next TC.

Tara and Tess talk alone. Tara tells her the Khangkhaw alliance is dead. Tara gets a confessional.

TARA: Tess is being immature.

Huh.

Tess moves on from Tara after ten seconds and goes to Adam. Adam denies the Khangkhaw alliance.

TESS: Tara told me the Khangkhaw alliance is dead. That means she wants me out.

ADAM: She’s not gonna get you out, Tess.

To be fair, do we know who Tara wants out? Like. . . .we as the viewer know NOTHING about Tara’s game. We just have to take Adam’s word for it considering no one else has no intention of eliminating Tara either.

ADAM: Tess is driving me insane. . .Why would we keep someone around who doesn’t trust anyone?

Eh, maybe because they are such a non-threat that they referred to Tree Mail as Mail Box?

And hey, wasn’t Tess your BFF pre-swap, Adam? What the heck happened to that?

Tess goes to Matt next.

TESS: It’s not that I don’t trust you, I just don’t know what information is true or false at the moment.

MATT: Tess, I don’t trust Tara at all.

Tara–Silent Assassin.

Matt admits to us that he doesn’t trust Tara because she got too excited by eliminating Brad.

MATT: It was the biggest move she has been apart of this game.

Ouch.

MATT: Think she might feel like the Sleepy Lioness now she’s gone out to go hunting.

What an analogy.

Adam tells Matt and Lisa about what Tara said to Tess about the Khangkhaw alliance being dead and she is on her own.

Oddly enough, Tara is now also on her own. Funny how it works out like that.

MATT: I am just going to sit back and let them bicker it out and then make my move.

“Bicker it out” is not a phrase, Matt.

Renee identifies a different vibe in camp and how much the alliances have altered. She and Tess are together rolling their eyes about what is going on. There is frequent footage of hands on hips. Also hands on hips combined with uber glaring.

 

POST-MERGE REWARD CHALLENGE #2

DAY 27

Chisholm asks Tess if she figured out what happened.

TESS: We had a wee debrief after it. . .we’re all sorted.

Debrief? What is this? MI-6?

For today’s challenge, they’ll be split into two teams. They will throw sandbags at a wall of the opposing tribe’s cubic puzzle pieces. Once they are done, they will switch and start rebuilding their own wall to complete the puzzle. Only one person on each team will rebuild the wall.

Wanna know what they’re playing for? They will travel to a movie location and watch JURASSIC WORLD.

ADAM: It’s my favorite! Jurassic Park was the first movie I remember watching it. . .I loved it and my family and I had it on tape. We had all of the fuzzy lines in it cause we watched it so much.

Popcorn, soft drinks, and sunset. . .and a double feature with Jack & Jill or Gulliver’s Travels! Their choice.

Chisholm asks what they do for fun at camp, and Adam says he sings for fun at camp including the Jurassic Park theme. Is there a reward Adam doesn’t like? Other than a secluded evening with Dylan and/or Dave?

Today’s challenge commences. Lots of sandbag tosses. Eve is doing well with her aim. Matt is throwing it like a baseball pitcher. Not much else exciting happens.

BLUE: MATT-DAVE-TESS-LISA

YELLOW: EVE-RENEE-ADAM-TARA

Lisa and Tara are not throwing. I presume they rebuild.

Everyone is on the rebuild at roughly the same time. Tara is cleaning the table while everyone else frantically collects the pieces. Eve is coaching Tara while Lisa is doing it solo. Renee jumps in as Tara is moving and carrying the pieces as slow as a sloth. Renee is burying her face into her hands.

ADAM: When we were getting the blocks, she was dusting the f–king bench.

RENEE: Why doesn’t she go f–king faster?

Maybe Tara is secretly trolling and we don’t know.

Eve is directing the whole puzzle from several metres away. Lisa’s tower of pieces is so high that I am surprised she isn’t asking for a stool.

Lisa places the last piece. Challenge is over. Tara didn’t even make it halfway into it.

RENEE (to TARA): Good try, good try.

That’s the weakest compliment ever.

TARA: It was a combination of dehydration and hard to concentrate. I knew I didn’t have much of a chance.

Chisholm asks if Lisa was afraid of the tower of pieces coming down and crushing her.

Speaking of crushing things, they’re about to watch a bunch of dinosaurs.

CHISHOLM: How about a big surprise from back home? . . .I understand the chickens back at camp can be reasonably entertaining.

Can the chickens back at camp sing the Jurassic Park theme, though?

ADAM: I don’t know why we picked Tara to do the puzzle. She was like ‘yeah, I had no idea.’ It would have been very nice to know that if you told us that earlier. It’s not fair when we have people more interested in dusting than watching the Jurassic Park movie–the best thing I have ever seen in my entire life. F–k.

 

PHSAN

DAY 27

ADAM: When we’re collecting the pieces, Tara is bloody dusting the f–king deck. She’s dusting it with her hand. Lisa has three columns going while Tara is dusting down the deck. . .there was no way we were gonna win. EVER.

Two hours later and Adam is still livid. Tara may want to sleep with one eye open.

Adam is extremely upset because he is the only one who likes Jurassic Park while the other four go off on a boat to watch the movie. In fact, all four of them enjoyed the reward last week. Those exact four. Jesus.

 

JURASSIC WORLD/SPONSORSHIP PLUG

DAY 27

Vodafone provides entertainment, pillows, couches, drinks, and popcorn. Matt is doing trick shots with the popcorn like it’s the cheese puffs from the Michael Scott Paper Company.

Dave’s girlfriend comes on the screen first with her cat. She looked to be more invested in the cat than in Dave.

DAVE: I was not expecting that. That just made me so homesick. I wasn’t ready for that.

Matt is sitting right beside him. So that whole statement is BS.

Tess’ family is next. Her dad is wearing an Indiana Jones hat. He sounds a wee bit hungover with his hoarse voice.

Matt’s fiancee, Jayde, is next. She gives a shoutout to Dave. Nah, just kidding. For some reason the video is an extreme close-up on her face. I don’t know why.

JAYDE: Just play your own game.

(DAVE comforts MATT while she says this.)

Well, too late for that.

Lisa spills her popcorn as her hubby and son appear on-screen. She cries less than Matt and Dave did. Her family does Cobra Kai-inspired kicks for the camera.

LISA (confessional): Of course you should vote out Matt. . .this money is for your family, and that’s what’s real. To go to the end with Matt. . .I would love it, but can’t beat him. . .I don’t want to be the person at the end who the jury looks at and says “why you even here?”

This is much more interesting than Jurassic World. Sorry, Adam.

 

PHSAN

DAY 28

I must point out Adam is in the most purple hammock I have ever seen. For some reason I didn’t notice how purple it was until now–it’s like somebody skinned Barney alive.

Adam makes random noises to the chickens. He starts singing the Chia theme. Eventually, he screams in excitement as he notices an egg has been laid. Everybody else runs over too.

ADAM: We’re gonna have an egg between eight!

Clarence Black would still eat the damn chicken.

LISA: Food production is going to have to pick up for me to not want to kill one of those chickens.

Or if you’re Lisa.

Tara is playing with twigs. She starts crying about not being able to see her family despite the game being over in just eleven days and knowing that’s what they signed up for before they went on the show but whatever.

Lisa comments on Tara’s teariness. There is sympathy but no sympathy at the same time.

Matt and Dave privately chat about Tara’s emotional instability.

MATT: If Eve doesn’t win the next immunity challenge, we go Eve. If not, we vote for Renee.

DAVE: Adam and Renee will always be gunning for me.

Dave tells us voting out Eve only benefits Matt since he has a working relationship with all other players in the game. Not to mention Dave and Renee both have their arrows pointed at each other.

After bland strategic talk for the remainder of the conversation, we disband.

Renee’s hair is a mess. She knows it. It ain’t day one.

RENEE: What do you think the others think about him?

MATT: Who?

RENEE: Dave.

Matt tells her it’ll be good if they, Tess, Adam, and Lisa all stick together. They agree Dave or Eve must go home. Matt tells us he will have to pick a side eventually.

Matt and Lisa chat. Lisa is scared of taking Tess to Final Four with them and Adam. Matt is nervous about Tara because she is a wildcard that no one knows what she’ll do.

MATT: If I was anyone else on the tribe, I would see myself as a target. . .I’m confident with my own gameplay I can beat anyone at this point. . .I believe I am playing a winner’s game.

Matt is going to be sooooooo blindsided. Not today, but soon. No one makes a statement like that and goes on to win the whole damn thing.

Lisa won’t vote out Matt today but knows she will have to eliminate him soon. Let’s break up this childhood bond.

 

INDIVIDUAL IMMUNITY CHALLENGE #3

DAY 29

Chisholm asks Dave how good it was to get away from the game (again). Then asks Tara how she felt about missing out on a message from her kids. Tears ensue. Adam looks like he is ready to make fun of her, but the botox makes it hard to tell.

Chisholm takes off Eve’s talisman smoothly.

RENEE: I really need this.

Yes you do, Ne Ne.

For today’s challenge, they’ll balance an oversized paddle on a stand. One at a time, they’ll roll a ball onto the paddle in one of six slots. First person to balance all six balls in the six slots wins immunity.

The budget is decreasing.

We rip into it.

Eve has two. Adam has two. Dave jumps up to three. He is doing well at a challenge for once. Adam has three. Matt is like a zombie when focused as he gets his first.

Tara, Lisa, and Renee can’t do sh-t in this challenge.

Dave has four. Adam has four. Chisholm talks about how immunity protects from the numerous blindsides in the game.

Dave has five. Adam misses a key ball. Dave keeps tilting his final ball, but he loses that one and two more!

Adam has his fifth.

Dave has a complete collapse as his three existing balls fall off. He is down to zilch.

Adam gets his final one. Chisholm is almost as excited as when Barb won immunity.

Everyone, including Adam, is genuinely shocked by Adam’s victory. By now Tom would have won immunity 5, 000, 000 times.

CHISHOLM: Adam, we can be anything we want to be when we grow up. Including a Jurassic Park podcast host.

Dave is having such a tough time being happy for Adam.

DAVE: It’s hard to be happy when I’ve come close so many times.

Dude. You got dead last in the previous challenge. What planet are you living on, mate?

Dave and Renee both have confessionals expressing relief that the other didn’t win.

 

PHSAN

DAY 29

Tess and Matt play with grass and collect newts from the lake. Tess relays the information that Renee is chasing down Dave and vice versa.

TESS: I think Matt wants Eve out.

Who does Eve want out? Has Eve had a confessional since prior to the merge? Has Tara of all people seriously had more airtime than her? We need a confessional count.

NOTE: I looked it up. Eve hasn’t had a confessional since the merge. She still has more than twice as many confessionals as Tara, though. Eve is 2nd to last with 23 and Tara has just 10. Everyone else has 32 or more.

TESS: I’d love to see Tara go but she’s not a threat.

Yeah, Tara is making it to day 39.

TESS: Would you vote Dave?

MATT: . . . . . . ………..Yeah.

So convincing. He should’ve been like “yeah, let’s cut that bitch” to everyone in the tribe to -really- fool them.

RENEE: This afternoon has been really really bizarre. Everyone seems really comfortable lazying around. Nobody is scrambling and I don’t know what’s going on. . .I know I am not in a very good position.

Cue Renee scrambling.

Renee talks to Tara.

TARA: I’m just going with what everyone else is doing.

RENEE: Who is everyone going for?

TARA: It’s a bit mixed. . .which is a bit interesting. I know that isn’t very enlightening for you. Sorry.

Tara is not very good at Survivor. You’re pretty much telling Renee she is going home.

Renee and Tess have a chat. Tess tells her Matt wants to eliminate Eve. They will go along with Matt to vote against Eve.

TESS: F–k. It could go either way.

Both Tess and Renee are afraid the plan is against them.

Renee pleads with Matt in the purple hammock to vote Dave. Adam is there and he wants Dave out too. Tess joins in on the conversation.

TESS: Yes. I’d stick with the numbers.

So all four are against Dave. Well, really three but you know. . .

TESS: Matt has turned into a slippery snake for me. . .I’m just gonna be on the bright side of Matt because he is calling the shots then. . .sh-t, and go for a beer.

So much for stress-free scrambling that Renee was observing earlier. Tess is very sketched out by how everyone is acting.

Renee has no choice but to let it all play out as Matt talks about being stronger than Zeus and Hercules combined.

 

TRIBAL COUNCIL #10

(YOS)-(KARLA)-(FRANKY)-(KAYSHA)-(LIAM)-(JOSH)-(JT)-(DYLAN)

(ARUN)-(BRAD)

X

(*ADAM*)-(iDAVEi)-(EVE)-(LISA)-(MATT)-(RENEE)-(TARA)-(TESS)

Brad’s mustache. My god. That could be a jury member of its own. Ron Jeremy is so jealous.

BRAD (to ARUN): You can pick up the people not looking at me.

CHISHOLM: Have we come to the point in the game where weakness becomes a strength because they’ll be taken to the end as an easy beat?

MATT: No, I think everyone here is strong.

(Camera cuts to TARA.)

Tara is being absolutely buried this episode.

Tess hopes the previous round’s alliance will eat one of their own.

Eve will vote against someone who is a strong player and cannot be trusted.

RENEE: I haven’t broken anyone’s trust here, the only name I’ve written down here is Dave.

DAVE: Even on the jury?

RENEE: You guys broke the trust first. When we went to vote out Josh, you told Matt and Josh to put my name down in case Josh had an immunity. So I was the scapegoat. So who wrote my name?

NOTE: Dylan has gone on record saying Renee is 100% telling the truth.

Dave and Matt proceed to deny this plan completely. Matt claims Renee hasn’t -built- trust with anyone.

RENEE: Matt’s calling the shots and everyone is going along with his punches which is unfortunate.

CHISHOLM: Is one person calling the punches?

TARA: Absolutely not.

RENEE: Tara, when I spoke to you earlier you said I have to wait to hear from the others. You couldn’t even tell me.

TARA: That’s right.

RENEE: Why not?

TARA: Because I didn’t know at that stage like I said to you. Everyone literally had a different idea as to who to vote for tonight.

ARUN: Complete bulls–t.

RENEE: Don’t let everyone else tell you how to vote. Just make up your own mind.

Chisholm asks who should go home tonight. Renee said Dave because he broke the trust first.

Renee rolls her eyes at Dave’s response at claiming he is truthful.

BRAD: I don’t think Renee’s going home.

(ARUN shakes his head.)

RENEE votes DAVE.

RENEE: I’ll keep writing your name down until I go.

MATT votes RENEE.

MATT: You’re one of the biggest hustlers in the game.

Yet Brad has the Ron Jeremy mustache.

ADAM (to TESS): What are we going to do?

Is it really that much up in the air?

Dave hangs onto his idol again.

FIRST VOTE: Renee

SECOND VOTE: Dave

THIRD VOTE: RENEE

Renee rolls her eyes and glares.

FOURTH VOTE: DAVE

2-2.

FIFTH VOTE: RENEE

3-2.

SIXTH VOTE: DAVE

Renee bits her lip.

SEVENTH VOTE: Renee

4-3. One vote left.

FINAL VOTE: Renee

Dammit.

The tribe has spoken.

Next Time on Survivor NZ: It’s the sweetest reward yet and the players will go to any lengths to win, but a hidden immunity idol changes the game and the journey to Tribal Council is a tangled web.

If Dave or Matt find that idol it is going to be a huge blow to this season.

*

Renee is glad to have put up a huge fight on her way out. She regrets not eliminating Dave sooner and is the reason why she is gone.

*

I don’t think Dave and Matt will make it to the end together. Adam and Lisa will definitely be keen to split them up very soon as both players are separately on their radar. Even if they don’t suspect them of being buddies, there is no way they will let both players go through unscathed.

Of course being successful with getting rid of both of them will be severely limited if this second idol gets claimed with so few rounds left. It’s the type of twist you’d see in the American version of Survivor.

It’s rare to see control be taken out of Adam’s hands. He wasn’t in on that 5-3 vote. If anybody can turn the tables, I think it’s that guy. It probably helps that Matt has now lost trust with Tess, and put his trust in an easily swayed Tara and a very rogue Lisa. A 5-2 vote could be in Matt’s future.

P.S. Please let Eve find another idol or Tara claim it for the lolz.

This is a very pivotal point in the season for Survivor NZ. The Dave and Matt relationship has evolved from its initial footnote to a now central point of controversy. It is on the verge of disrupting the overall integrity of Survivor NZ, and if that holds up through to the end of the season, this could really put the franchise in jeopardy.

And I have a feeling production is thinking the same thing as Renee exits the game.

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