Australian Survivor

Australian Survivor: #NoMoreHashtagsPlease

Logan Saunders recaps the eighteenth episode of Week 8 of Australian Survivor, the auction episode.

Australian Survivor: #NoMoreHashtagsPlease

EPISODE 18

Previously on Aussie Survivor: After the two tribes merged, Locky flipped on his old Samatau alliance. The crucial move handed control to the Asaga alliance and Locky tried to pin the blame on Anneliese. As the two faced off, Anneliese didn’t have the numbers but she did have an immunity idol. The bad news for Anneliese was that Ziggy had a Super Idol. Master strategist Henry went to work trying to convince Ziggy to work with him and Locky.

At Tribal Council, Henry’s plan came off perfectly. Anneliese caught in Henry’s triple play.

Ten are left; who will be voted out tonight?

bar-4NIGHT 38 – ASASOHCOHTOA

Everyone wants a story from Ziggy. Especially Tessa. Petey and Tessa pretend to still be with Ziggy and that they trust her.

Ziggy knows this ruined her relationship with Tessa and Petey.

ZIGGY: I had to decide between sticking with them that we’re a dying alliance or go with Locky and Henry.

But Locky would have been the dying one, and Anneliese, Petey, and Tessa would all still be alive.

HENRY: Everyone came back to Tribal like “great move great move” but I was the one who made that happen. I am so proud of myself.

Same ol’ Henry.

HENRY: I am the king of Survivor. I am in control going forward. Geez, look out.

I could’ve sworn this was the exact same state Henry was in when he decided to mutiny from Asaga to Samatau about twenty days ago. Has Henry learned his lesson that he is up against eight capable players in this game and Tara?

bar-4ASASOHCOHTOA

nicolalockytessa

        Ziggy            Locky            Tessa

michelleHenrypeter

        Michelle     Henry           Peter

 

sarahluke

     Sarah              Luke                       

jerichotara

      Jericho          Tara          

bar-4DAY 39 – ASASOHCOHTOA

Tara doesn’t realize there are ten people left. Others have to double-count for her. We get yet another “I miss my family” confessional. Didn’t we go through this with all eleven people last episode? This is a bit extreme. It makes my blogs shorter, anyway.

Henry says day thirty-nine is a massive milestone. That’s another repetitive quote of this season. Henry brags about hanging onto an idol for an unprecedented thirty-five days.

HENRY: [Locky] is my bromance out here. I love this guy.

So Henry will be voting yes, I presume?

Henry says the immediate target shall be Tessa. Locky concurs.

bar-4INDIVIDUAL REWARD #2

It’s auction time.

SARAH: Look at that gavel.

It should be noted the gavel is the biggest piece of crap I have ever seen.

Everyone has five hundred dollars. Andrea & Ebonie have already spent all of it.

LOCKY: It’s a lot of chicken parmies and a lot of burritos.

Chicken parmies? You mean chicken parmesan? lol aussies.

ITEM #1: ?????

Luke bids 260. Ziggy pops it to 300. Luke goes up to 320 after a long pause.

ZIGGY: No.

It is Luke’s for 320 buckaroos.

Luke says it smells good. The cover is lifted.

It’s a note. Maybe the note is scented?

LUKE: “You’ve just bought yourself out of this auction, but don’t despair because any item that is bid on you will also receive”.

JLP unveils a table for one that Luke sits alone.

SARAH: You get no rice tonight.

I think Luke is fine with that.

ITEM #2: Smashed avocado–

ZIGGY: 500. That’s what I want.

Smashed avocado sandwich with veggies and a glass of orange juice, by the way. Luke also gets a plate.

JERICHO: He gets his own one?

Jericho. You should be the last one complaining about somebody else receiving extra food.

ITEM #3: CHEESECAKE

HENRY: 100.

JLP: Wait, there’s more!

(JLP brings out a glass of champagne.)

HENRY: 500.

I like how JLP pulls a full cocaine addict infomercial impression. All you have to do is pay shipping and handling!

I get a kick out of Luke receiving his own dish after each person. Luke was the perfect person for this.

JLP: Michelle, what are you waiting for?

MICHELLE: I’m waiting for a pizza or a burger and fries.

LUKE: That’s the same thing I’m waiting for!

It’s like Kramer from Seinfeld–what’s yours is his.

ITEM #4: MYSTERY ITEM #2

SARAH: 500.

You guys know you bid in twenty dollar increments, right?

Sarah bought an icy cold coconut…And…

.

.

.

A straw. You can use your mouth or snort something with a straw.

Luke gets one too.

LUKE: It’s not too bad.

SARAH: Shut up, Luke.

ITEM #5: Mexican Feast

MICHELLE: 500! Wait, is that a burrito?

Yep. Burrito. Chips. Salsa. Locky also bids 500.

JLP: What’s missing from this?

JAN GENTRY: Beer!

LOCKY: Margarita.

Yes, a margarita. Jan loses again. JLP brings out a margarita.

JERICHO: Aw. That’s my drink.

Locky pushes in all five hundred. Michelle does too.

It’s time to draw rocks over a five hundred dollar Mexican feast.

Locky celebrates like I have never seen him celebrate anything in his life.

LOCKY: I don’t even like margaritas.

What are “Things That Will Make Michelle Punch You in the Face” for five hundred, Alex.

Luke is walking over, but JLP stops him.

JLP: No. You stay there.

LUKE: Oh, you’re bringing it over! That’s service! (chewing food) afhkdhfklalkgj.

ITEM #6: PHONE CALL HOME

Our third episode with a home-based reward this season.

Tara puts in all five hundred.

JLP: Who you gonna call?

TARA: Ghostbusters!

Why not your kids?!

The sound quality on the audio is horrible during the phone call. Apparently, there is video but we don’t see it. My assumption is that this phone call was unexpected for those on the receiving end.

My parents would hate a season like this.

Now it’s Luke’s turn. More tears.

LOCKY (most awkward voiceover ever): I’m so glad he got that.

Moving on…

ITEM #7: MYSTERY ITEM #3

Jericho pays two hundred for a burger, crinkle cut fries, and a soda. Tessa rolls her eyes.

LUKE: This is the most amazing day ever!

ITEM #8: ADVANTAGE AT NEXT IMMUNITY CHALLENGE

Petey pays 320 for the immunity challenge advantage after Jericho bids his remaining 300. Luke gets it too which makes him flex in front of everyone.

ITEM #9: MYSTERY ITEM #4. It’s huge.

Jericho shrugs it off.

Tessa pays eighty.

SARAH: She’s got five hundred.

JERICHO: Well she’s gonna win and that’s wretch of me…so three hundred.

TESSA: You serious? 320. You’re not getting any more.

Tessa wins pizza, chocolates, and a day at the spa to get clean. Essentially, it’s the same reward she gave up at the start of the merge. How fitting. Oh, and champagne.

Furthermore, she can pick one person.

Tessa chooses Michelle because she paid 500 for a rock.

HENRY: Sarah paid five hundred bucks for a coconut too.

SARAH: She chose to bid; I didn’t choose to bid.

LOCKY: Why didn’t you speak up, Sarah?

SARAH: The decision was already made up.

Oh yeah, and Luke joins them on the reward. Luke, Michelle, Tessa. That’s an interesting combo.

Sarah is not impressed.

LUKE: Oh my Lord. I feel so sick.

Henry gives Sarah a big ol’ hug.

HENRY: Tessa taking Luke and Michelle–really good strategic move but I’ve got Sarah. And that stare. Oh my god…that’s something I can work with to get Tessa out next.

The camera cuts to the coconut with a straw in it left behind on the table. Sarah didn’t want to take it back to camp with her. So ungrateful.

bar-4DAY 39 – SPA DAY

Lame pepperoni pizza, chocolates, and champagne awaits them in front of a three-person bed.

MICHELLE: My preparation going into this game was to get a pedicure, a manicure, and a great spray tan for TV.

There is no such thing as a “great spray tan”.

Michelle asks Tessa if she knows how to open a glass of champagne.

It would be hilarious if three people went on reward who didn’t know how to open a glass of champagne.

MICHELLE: That’s just-that-the-the-they-all-and-champagne. They are my favourite things.

Michelle hasn’t been happier in her life.

LUKE: Everyone’s going back and it’s raining again.

MICHELLE: And it’s raining again. And that makes it sweeter!

Luke refers to himself as the king of the game once more.

TESSA: Taking Michelle was ten percent about pizza, five percent about champagne, and eighty-five percent strategy.

Tessa refers to Michelle as an emotional voter. I dunno about that, Tess. Michelle has been fairly ice cold. As ice cold as the champagne, in fact.

Tessa’s plan is to go after Locky, Ziggy, Henry, and Tara.

MICHELLE: Our strategy should be to calm the frick down on the champagne.

As a viewer, that’s a terrible strategy.

bar-4DAY 39 – ASASOHCOHTOA

SARAH: There was no point in her taking Michelle. That was stupid. It was just stupid. She shouldn’t have taken Michelle. It was just stupid. It was like, literally, well, that was stupid.

I have never heard the word stupid uttered so many times in four sentences.

HENRY: The sweetest thing today was seeing Sarah’s reaction to Tessa taking Michelle.

As sweet as the jam, Henry?

Henry wants to open that crack up and make a move. His plan is to reinforce her hatred for Tessa.

PETEY: If she could’ve picked somebody else, she would have picked you too.

LOCKY: What are you talking about, Petey?

PETEY: Well, she could only pick one person.

Petey–The voice of reason. He worries about Sarah’s reaction.

bar-4DAY 39 – SPA DAY

MICHELLE: Did we just become best friends?!

Yes, Michelle just quoted Will Ferrell.

More champagne. Tessa says she sees Henry and Locky as “a ridiculous threat”.

MICHELLE: Henry can be a different person to suit who he is talking to. He is very manipulative. He manipulated Locky. How does anyone manipulate Locky?

I don’t know if manipulating Locky is that difficult.

Michelle and Luke want Henry gone before Locky. Tessa asks who has the other idol.

Michelle reveals that Henry has an idol. Tessa has an overreaction to it by slapping the table after a long pause. It might be the champagne.

Tessa didn’t expect both Henry and Ziggy to have an idol.

Michelle knows blindsiding Henry when he has an idol will be risky.

LUKE: You gotta understand us three going creates weird stuff for us.

LUKE:  I like big moves. I like big plays. But under my terms.

Luke, Michelle, and Tessa pinky swear to keep their strategy limited to the reward.

bar-4DAY 40  – REWARD

Tessa, Michelle, and Luke wake up in their bed. For Luke’s and Tessa’s spouses: Nothing happened. No, seriously.

They wake up with cream on a stick. The hashtag #ChampagneAlliance appears on screen. Sigh. Seriously, Aussie Survivor?

bar-4DAY 40 – ASASOHCOHTOA

Locky, Henry, and Ziggy are up in the morning. Locky expresses his concern that everyone is aware they are the power three with Tara, and they might band together.

HENRY: Locky is paranoid…I can’t see it. Luke and Michelle are definitely on my side. On top of that I know I got Sarah. Sarah is already angry at Tessa for taking Michelle so I have nothing to worry about there. So right now I am sitting pretty.

Locky is alone with Sarah. He wants to know Sarah’s thoughts. Sarah’s thoughts are kept to herself in a confessional.

SARAH: It was all an act to create some visible distance between Tessa and myself. Now I can make a move that sends a big threat home tonight. Henry is still playing this loyalty to Jericho facade, but Anneliese told me about Henry’s idol. The idol that belonged to the clue he had given to Jericho all that time ago. He had it in his pocket the whole time.

Ouch. Henry botched his relationship with Anneliese.

Sarah convinces Jericho of the truth.

JERICHO: Mother trucker.

He resorts to the ol’ John Vito & Jill “Say anything but the F-word” as a reaction.

Jericho wants to make a fool out of Henry after he made a fool out of him.

JERICHO: He’s not going to see it coming. It’ll be the most hilarious thing.

Or close to it.

HENRY: The worst thing that could happen is Tessa or Petey wearing the immunity necklace, but right now I am pretty confident. I am confident that me, Locky, and Ziggy will take the win. And when that happens we’re going to take Tessa out.

bar-4

INDIVIDUAL IMMUNITY CHALLENGE #3

TARA: That smell. I don’t know what that smell is.

Tessa, Michelle, and Luke smell like as good as a written note.

TARA: White robes? That’s disgusting.

The white mages from Final Fantasy are offended.

Michelle, she now appreciates the little things but wishes she knew what was going on back at camp.

JLP: It was bittersweet.

MICHELLE: It was pretty sweet.

. . .No jam or cookie pun? Thank god.

For today’s challenge, we have something completely unoriginal. They will balance on a beam while balancing a ball on a wooden bow. As the challenge progresses, they will move further along the beam. Last person left standing wins immunity.

LUKE AND PETEY ADVANTAGE: Start 30 seconds after everyone else at the stage of their choosing.

Smallest. Advantage. Ever.

Luke decides to use his advantage on the opening stage. Geez Luke, if you need an advantage on the first stage then you won’t be winning this at all.

Michelle is out of the challenge before Luke even starts. She doesn’t even say anything.

LUKE: God damn it.

Champagne messed up Michelle’s equilibrium.

That rain is coming down hard.

Tara is out. JLP talks about the pounding rain on the audio.

Sarah is out. We hear thunder.

JLP: Ziggy drops out.

LOCKY: Who?

LUKE: Zig.

Yes, Ziggy is out early in an endurance challenge. Locky can’t comprehend that.

JLP: Three, two, one. . .grab your balls.

Thank god it’s Survivor 35 that has the urologist.

Stage one is over. We now enter stage two.

Jericho nearly rescues himself, but he’s out.

LOCKY: Is Henry out?

LUKE: No, he’s still in.

Why is Locky checking in with Luke rather than listening to JLP’s commentary?

The rain has not stopped whatsoever. Mixture of water and sweat. The beam, bow, and balls are all slippery.

Stage two is over. They grab their balls again.

This is the final stage.

Petey can’t even balance on the beam. He is out two seconds after JLP counts him in. He was jumping off and on the whole time.

LUKE: I wasted my advantage.

No kidding.

As Luke falls, he bounces his ball into the air then catches it. Way to go out with style.

Locky, Tessa, and Henry are the last three in this challenge. So intense.

The yoga instructor can’t contort his body enough to save himself. He tosses his bow into the jungle out of frustration.

Locky versus Tessa. Tessa’s legs are quivering. Locky is rock solid as his and Ziggy’s abs. That ball has never moved. Tessa’s ball keeps sliding back and forth until she centers it. Impressive.

JERICHO: Oh my god.

Time for a chat.

TESSA: How you doin’ there, Lock?

LOCKY: I am doing good.

Nice of them to check in.

TESSA: Come on Locky, just fall.

Fifteen minutes into the final round. Tessa says the bow is very heavy.

Locky’s ball moves and it goes straight over the edge. That’s it. Tessa wins immunity. Henry is flabbergasted.

Tessa has won two out of four individual challenges thus far. And one of those wins was while being hungover from champagne. Impressive.

Locky expects chaos to be sent into camp now that Tessa is safe.

bar-4DAY 40 – ASASOHCOHTOA

HENRY: Tessa winning the immunity necklace today sucked. It would have been an easy vote.

Just like Samatau’s vote against Luke was an easy vote.

Henry now shifts his target to Petey–the only person who has never aligned with him.

The rain keeps coming down and everyone huddles together under the shelter as the rain is refusing to stop.

Tessa wants to pull Petey aside. She succeeds.

LOCKY: What gameplay is that?

The gameplay of somebody who doesn’t want to lose their #1 ally, Lock.

Tessa informs Petey of the Champagne Alliance. It’ll be a six-person alliance against Henry. Their only play is to misdirect Henry and ensure he does not play his idol.

For some reason, both Tessa and Petey are hopping back and forth all throughout their conversation as if it is completely normal. It is like they are playing an invisible game of Double Dutch.

Luke’s plan is to camp. Locky asks what happened at the tent in terms of strategy. Luke feeds a few lies that it was just old Samatau stories and saying they want to get revenge on Locky and Ziggy.

LUKE: Locky is getting scared. That’s good cause Henry is going home.

A paranoid Locky is great for the minority.

Michelle confirms with Locky if they are voting Petey.

Locky and Henry now suspect Petey and Tessa are chasing down an idol. Into the jungle they go.

Locky and Henry have a phony conversation with Petey and Tessa.

LOCKY: So I’m pretty sure they’re gunning for one of us.

PETEY: And who do you guys want?

TESSA: I’m pretty sure it was me if I wasn’t going to win.

PETEY: I’m worried it’s me.

LOCKY: That’s what the consensus is, but the consensus is never the real fact.

TESSA: What are you proposing?

LOCKY: Anyone but me ’cause I know you’re gunning for me, Tess.

TESSA: Well that’s out of the bag.

LOCKY: I want to get you to choose someone else, though.

TESSA:Well, I like you.

LOCKY: You just want to get me out?

TESSA: I just say I really wanna get you. I can get over it, though. I got over it once before.

LOCKY: We’re definitely willing to work.

PETEY: We can go for Sarah.

HENRY: Just trying to think will the other two come with or not.

TESSA: Well why don’t you go get them? Go get them and let’s talk all together.

Another week of major cat-and-mouse.

Tessa keeps bouncing after they leave.

Locky pulls Henry aside paranoid that Tessa and Petey are with Michelle and Luke. Henry thinks it is nonsense. Locky is worried about an idol, but Henry doesn’t think they have anything.

Henry and Locky talk to Luke and Jericho. Henry reiterates his confidence in a confessional that the minority will vote Locky.

Luke and Michelle quickly chat. Neither has spoken to Jericho and Sarah. No eye contact or conversations have happened.

Michelle says she has thirty seconds.

MICHELLE: We’re all doing Henry. We decided last night. Write it down. Pretend I am talking to you because I don’t want any hard feelings over the rewards.

Sarah informs us she is happy the target is Henry, but there is no in-depth conversations because everyone stays huddled.

Luke is standing behind Ziggy as he mouths the words “Tonight we get Henry” with the craziest eyes I have ever seen.

Jericho is worried because if Henry suspects anything then the idol will be played.

JERICHO: Then there is going to be war.

How many times has Jericho uttered the word “war” or “battle” since the start of the season?

Locky and Henry have one last conversation.

LOCKY: Tessa would be too smart to get you. She knows you have an idol.

HENRY: Perfect.

Tessa is happy Locky is paranoid entering Tribal Council.

HENRY: I’m not worried at all. I’ll take my idol just in case. If there is a chance I might be going home, I’m gonna play it.

bar-4TRIBAL COUNCIL #19

(JOAN)-(ADAM)-(KATE)-(MARK H)-(AIMEE)-(SAMANTHA)-(MARK W)-(JACQUI)-(KENT)-(AK)-(BEN)-(ODETTE)-(JARRAD)-(ANNELIESE)

X

(HENRY)-(JERICHO)-(LOCKY)-(LUKE)-(MICHELLE)-(PETEY)-(SARAH)-(TARA)-(TESSA)-(ZIGGY)

Henry whistles as Anneliese walks by.

HENRY: Damn.

Focus on the game, Zenry.

Oddly enough, now is when the rain stops.

MICHELLE: Chocolates and the champagne was the best.

TESSA: And pizza too.

MICHELLE: Pizza was good too.

SARAH: I don’t want to hear about it.

And neither does anyone else except Luke, I assume.

JLP repeatedly asks if leaving camp was advantageous.

Ziggy isn’t concerned Tessa’s strategizing at the reward will amount to anything.

LUKE: As far as I’m concerned they could discuss whatever the hell they wanted. I was hungry as hell. I got to sit down and eat all that food. Legitimately anything could have happened yesterday and I wouldn’t worry because I was starving. I wasn’t thinking about strategy–I was concerned about eating.

Henry shrugs off anything substantial happening at the reward, and it’s no use being paranoid. Sarah agrees.

Petey thinks a select group is unbeatable and powerful in the game. He is scared seeing their rise to power as normal people get voted out.

Locky thinks an unbeatable player is somebody who wins every single immunity challenge in a row. Tessa rolls her eyes. JLP confirms if she rolled her eyes.

JLP: There are people who are more unbeatable than others.

The word has officially lost all meaning.

Michelle says Locky, Henry, and Ziggy’s challenge strength is not the be all and end all, especially when Tessa won a second challenge. She says you have to read the jury’s mind to be an unbeatable person.

JLP: What does the jury consider to be a winner?

JERICHO: I think you have to tickle the boxes in this game.

Tickle the boxes? Tickle the boxes? Elmo would be an unbeatable player!

And yes, I know what Jericho meant.

JLP: Is the jury going to respect big moves?

JERICHO: #bigmovez are respected in this game.

Sarah says she will be taking the easy option tonight. Locky and Ziggy grin.

TARA: I think tonight will be an easy vote. Pretty straightforward vote.

PETEY: That’s not a good sign. If it’s straightforward then I’m going home.

Michelle says eliminating Jarrad determined a lot of things.

MICHELLE: If it ain’t broken, don’t fix it.

Tessa puts on her Chancellor hoodie. She thinks people should listen to her more.

LOCKY: And get me out.

Henry says every Tribal Council has gone down the way he has expected it to every single time. This shall be no exception.

It’s time to vote.

MICHELLE (voting unknown): For me, this is the easy vote cause it benefits my game.

There is a lot of beard stroking from Locky and Henry.

TESSA (voting Henry): Fingers crossed this works.

HENRY (voting PETEY): It’s an easy vote but at the same time it’s a strategic vote…I’ve got to get rid of Samatau one by one.

LUKE (voting HENRY): So I’ve decided to vote Peter tonight (miming Pinnochio with nose extending out) I’m a real boy.

JLP: If anybody has a hidden immunity idol and would like to play it, now would be the time to do so.

LOCKY (whispering to HENRY): Play it. Play it.

HENRY: . . .

JLP: OK.

FIRST VOTE: HENRY

SECOND VOTE: HENRY

THIRD VOTE: HENRY

Tara twitches.

FOURTH VOTE: Henry

FIFTH VOTE: HEN

Tara is laughing.

SIXTH VOTE: HENRY

Henry is up even before the sixth vote.

Tessa and Luke fist bump. Luke is laughing too.

LOCKY: I told him.

ZIGGY: Amazing.

HENRY: J, snuff away.

Luke applauds.

Henry congratulates everyone and claps his hands then flexes.

HENRY: Dear me.

TARA: Far out.

bar-4

Next Time on Aussie Survivor: With the game’s biggest strategist gone, there is a vacancy on top. Who will take control?

Henry can’t stop smiling in his final words.

SARAH: I’m going with the numbers I’ve worked with from Asaga, but knowing you I’d be surprised if you didn’t see this coming.

Henry wants to be known as the guy who tried everything and did forty days with half of a yoga class.

JERICHO: You are accelerating way too fast in this game and I have to put you down.

Henry is the first one on Aussie Survivor to be eliminated with an idol in his pocket.

***

I think Henry will be the player most responsible for Monday morning quarterbacking of any Survivor player I have seen on TV. He was like the Lyoto Machida of Survivor–several unorthodox moves, but somehow he managed to get to the top a couple of times before being thrown back down.

I know another Aus Survivor blogger out there who is doing a separate post strictly dedicated to all of Henry’s moves throughout the game.

I think we all know what did Henry in though: Leaving Asaga and heading to Samatau. All of his closest allies were picked off before merge, and Henry had no choice but to rely on his bench players to keep him safe post-merge. Clearly, the baggage from Asaga’s early 5 vs. 4 divide is too much when three of those four are still in the game.

If Henry stayed on Asaga, Luke, Jericho, and Sarah would be traded in for Jacqui, Kent, and Ben. Things would be a helluva lot different. He could have probably made a good connection with Locky at the merge too. That bromance was real as Henry says.

***

Tessa may be one of the best players I have seen rally from the bottom other than Kristie. I know it wasn’t terribly difficult when Henry is strong in challenges, has enemies in his own alliance, and possessed an idol, but it looked like either she or Petey were doomed to go this round. 6-4 was her best case scenario, and that is exactly the scenario she was able to get. Especially when the conversations with Jericho and Sarah had a running time of under a minute.

Also, what’s with the bunny hops?

***

The streak of underedited players came to an end this week. Petey avoided this curse. I don’t know how much longer the Asaga Four will stay with Petey, but with Locky and Ziggy being really strong personalities, we would assume he has at least one round to get by with bonds.

***

And when did Anneliese tell Sarah about Henry’s idol? This was the most influential piece of information to sway Jericho’s vote, but yet we didn’t see Anneliese and Sarah have this conversation last week. Wouldn’t that be just a tad bit vital to include in the episode?

***

Locky’s rivalry with Tessa has been hilarious. I like that they just pretty much acknowledge that they view each other as threats who will never be able to work together no matter what web of lies they try to weave together.

***

Usually, when people keep talking about how awesome they are, it tends to irritate a good chunk of the audience. When Luke does it, very few people even get mad about it.

I have concluded Luke gets away with it because he has a great deal of charm and you know only ten percent of it is serious. He is essentially role-playing an MMA fighter by pretending to have a title belt around his waist and referring to himself as the king of the jungle.

And the king of the jungle needs a feast and a good night’s sleep once in a while.

***

For the love of god we do not need any more scenes or rewards involving contact with home. This week it just made the momentum of the fun and jovial antics of the auction come to a screeching halt. We get it. Everyone misses their families. Like, a lot. This is the third time, producers. They’ll see them in fifteen days. Just let them be.

***

Tara has taken quite the beating on social media over the past few weeks. It seems like Tara became nearly everybody’s least favourite player when she boasted about beating AK in their rivalry.

Perhaps it is a combination of this, her early moral superiority, and then referring to many people as puppets when she clearly attaches herself to Locky.

To my knowledge, nobody in the cast hates Tara outside of the game, but it is interesting to dissect why the general audience is not too keen on Tara.

I think the next step to enrage the audience will be if Tara gets dragged to the end as a goat and says she is such a good player for making it to day 55 and inevitably losing. That might put it into overdrive.

For anyone that knows me, I have been studying social media reactions to contestants for a REALLY long time, and this is the latest case of it.

***

For somebody who trolled Tessa at the auction, it is surprising that nobody has put the pieces together that Jericho wanted to eat all of the jam. I could see Jericho being the host in an Aussie reboot of Punk’d.

***

So that’s it. Luke, Jericho, Sarah, and Michelle seem to be in a very good position. They could be overthrown, but I just can’t see a scenario where old Samatau reunites. Locky and Tara haven’t exactly been fluid players unless they form a really close personal bond with somebody on the other side.

Locky and Tara will just need to throw Ziggy under the bus or some other large automobile to buy themselves a bit more time.

***

After forty days, Sarah and Michelle prove they can do whatever the hell they want without facing any repercussions and negativity. How the hell did Henry think he had Sarah in his corner? Isn’t it common knowledge that she has been a double agent since the beginning of the game? In fact, I believe Henry himself had confessionals about Sarah being a double agent…as well as everyone else left in this game.

P.S. Sala doesn’t know if voting out Henry was the right decision.

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